This may be a tough questions for some people, I know that when I asked my self this question, I really had to think about it for a minute. I feel like some obvious answers for me would be God, my family, friendships and exercise (mainly because it makes me a happier person and I can justify my love for food!), but what REALLY motivates me? As I go down the list and cross off the evident things that move me into action, I’m not sure what’s left. It may sound silly to really have to dig deep and think about it, but it really took me longer than I would have thought to realize what motivates me and WHY.
I feel as women we sometimes have it a little more difficult than men (I know some might disagree and that’s ok, this is purely my opinion), but I think a lot of the time we are expected to have it all together. And let me tell you, I DO NOT HAVE IT ALL TOGETHER PEOPLE! I think sometimes there’s this silent (and not so silent) expectation hanging over us to cook, clean, take care of the home, get the homework done with the kids, take care of the kids, take care of the finances, laundry, bills, pets, neighbors, baking, bathing, etc, and on top of it, exercise, look nice, dress nice, act nice and be nice?! Are you freaking kidding me?! It’s impossible for me to have it all together and be sane at the same time, just ask my kids! 😉
To be completely transparent and honest, even when I feel I have it all together (which is really rare), I’m NOT completely satisfied. I have tried and tried to stuff myself into this box of what I think I should be, who I should be, the mother I should be, the wife I need to be blah blah blahbity blah! And at the end of the day, I’m miserable because that’s not who I am. And let me tell you, on those ‘perfect’ days, my family aint too happy either. I come out of that stupid box completely drained and all I have to show for it is homemade chicken soup, burnt salad and bi*&#ing kids. REALLY?!! This is what I’m meant to do with my life?!….. No. It’s not. Well, yes it is, but not really. I may be called to be a loving wife and mom, supporting my husband, raising our kids in the way of the Lord to my BEST ability, not to perfect dinner recipes from Pinterest and pack my kids lunch until they’re 25, and it’s not my job to conform my children into who I think they should be, but to encourage them to be who God calls them to be, to teach them love, humbleness, Godly principles, integrity and family values. I receive an F on this stuff too at times (ok, maybe a lot of times), but when I come back to the reality that I’m not in control, only God is, I can relax and take a break.
So. What motivates me? Not cooking 24/7 and folding 27,000 loads of laundry! More like working and accomplishing something whether it’s an amazing new hair color for a client or creating a super cute and stylish outfit for my followers, socializing with my girlfriends (and really anyone who will talk to me!), bringing home some bacon $$$, feeling needed, wanted and respected, being alone and gathering my thoughts, journaling, praying, relaxing with a pen and paper and glass of wine…… I’ve learned over the years of being a single mom, working 6-7 days a week for 7 years, I LOVE to work! I love being busy. Sometimes I think being SO busy kept me from actually dealing with some emotional stuff that stemmed from my divorce, and I eventually had to face what I was stuffing under my bed for so many years, but I actually really enjoy always having something to do. Working kept and still keeps me sane! It doesn’t say anywhere in a manual or the bible that we have to be stay at home mom’s, wives, or slaves to our families and kitchens. I also know there are so many women who are awesome stay at home moms, who do their jobs beautifully and get their motivation from that, which is so amazing!
I just started reading the book ‘A Woman’s Place: A Christian View for Your Calling in the Office, the Home, and the World” by Katelyn Beaty and so far she talks about everything I have struggled with for so long! She highlights on Genesis where God speaks to Adam and Eve about being ‘fruitful and multiplying, ruling over the fish in the sea, the birds in the sky and every living creature that moves’. He spoke to BOTH of them, not just Adam. We were created to work too! Whether our work is at home, at an office or traveling world wide, it’s completely natural for us to WANT to work. She also pointed out that there were several women in the bible who worked and were successful, for example: Priscilla was a tentmaker Acts 18:2-4 and Lydia was a successful purple cloth ‘seller’ Acts 16:14. I’m so excited to dig deeper into this book and unveil even more of what she has to say about us and our ‘roles’.
What motivates you? Are you a working mom, a stay at home mom (which is a huge job in itself!), or a single career woman? I’d love to hear your story and what motivates you to do what you love!